The rise of the lady-dudes

I’m storming along the sidewalk, edging closer to her, stomping my boots in the heavy tracks I make as I race down the pavement eager to get home after my day. As I approach, I notice the familiar anxiety ripple through her, expressed in the pieced, on-edge body language. She tries to glance around in her peripheral vision, pulling out her phone as if ready to call her comrade on speed dial, should he or she be required. I know this because I am her, as is any female walking by herself at night: alert to predators as if an animal on the savannah.

As I pass her and smile, I am overjoyed that she relaxes her shoulders and embraces almighty relief to see that it’s a fellow sister, out like she is, on her journey from A to B. I feel glad that I’m not the one she’s getting ready to fend off and sad that she has to anticipate the worst to begin with.

We are lightyears ahead of where we’ve ever been before – quite literally – but developmentally there is still an enormous divide amongst the people of this planet. There is a sickening imbalance that runs through us as a collective and it is the reason that we are not yet at peace.

I have a friend – a male friend – who once told me over a couple beers that all the problems on this planet are caused by men and their testosterone. I can’t say I whole-heartedly agree as there are plenty of destructive females walking around the globe too, but I think there’s a lot to be said for the imbalance of masculine and feminine energies on the planet corrupting our way of life.


A typical female role that can be witnessed in much of the world is that of the home-maker, with the male partner providing for the family. In western societies, a woman is told that in order to succeed, she must do it all: play the feminine and masculine roles. She must be able to bear children and raise them well, whilst also proving her self-worth in a frequently male-dominated corporate work-place. But why are men never asked to play both roles? I think we’re trying to work towards a paradigm where that is the case – particularly in more liberal parts of the world – but for now there is still a huge disparity between the way both genders are treated, whether we want to admit that or not.

A female should not be told that she has to be more like a man in order to succeed in this world. For an individual born to embody feminine energy (whether this person is biologically female or male is irrelevant), she is limiting her growth and development by trying to suppress that and instead taking on the disguise of the masculine. She will never be her strongest or her happiest if she continues to do so. If free to embody her most feminine, she is able to balance the masculine energy of her surroundings.

That’s really what we’re lacking here: balance. We’re lacking males who are comfortable with seeing females as equals and as such feel the need to dominate them and females who don’t feel as though they can be proud of their feminine traits and so try to convince themselves that they need to change.

It doesn’t matter if you’re a woman who identifies as male or vice versa, you should comfortably embody divine feminine energy if that is what feels most natural to you. You should, in turn, respect the masculine energy of the world. And perhaps what needs to be shouted louder is for those with masculine energy to respect the beautiful divine feminine for what it is. You need it, whether you like it or not, and you are happiest when the two are in balance in your life.

If we remove the idea that the only way to get what you want is to manipulate and dominate, we are left with respect and scope for learning and growth. So why aren’t we doing that already? Why is there such an imbalance remaining? What are males that refuse to see females as equals so scared of? What do they think might happen? And why do so many so-called feminists feel the need to prove themselves to the males of our culture? We can be lady-dudes without being ladydudes and still be equal.

Not every female is very feminine and not every male is very masculine. This is why we see gender fluidity in our culture. There is nothing wrong with being a woman who has no desire to have children, but rather work and provide for her family; likewise there is nothing wrong with a man who would do better job raising children and taking care of the family than working in the corporate world. What is wrong is that this isn’t yet considered acceptable globally; there is still a stigma attached to women of a certain age who haven’t had children and men who don’t work to ‘provide’ in the traditional sense.

incline village

The moment we start accepting all people for whatever they bring to the table – regardless of gender – is the moment we are able to coexist in a more harmonious society.



  1. 8th January 2016 / 6:19 pm

    It’s kind of sad when you realize how painfully true that is. But I think people are starting to raise questions now. Jennifer Lawrence is a brilliant example of how women are no longer sitting down and letting men get away with all of this anymore.

    • 8th January 2016 / 8:31 pm

      Let’s encourage change! I believe we can do it, anyway.

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